Volvo town buses are a great hit in Bangalore, especially amongst techies (I can see some techies objecting to the term ‘town buses’ as condescending, after all IT guys are of a rare pedigree and isn’t town bus a trifle demeaning?). It will generally be not that wrong to assume that a travel in Volvo ought be a nice, cool and pleasant experience and especially after shelling out quite a generous (or extortionate) fare. Alas, things are not that simple in this complex world. From outside everything looks swanky and great, but inside it’s a different story altogether.
The music system will blare all the inanities dished out by the plethora of radio stations and the ads repeated ad nauseam. The repeated requests to the conductor to tone down the volume will go unheard. You can’t do anything except grit your teeth and endure the torture. The office hours will be crowded like hell and if you don’t get a seat you really had it. You will have to sway as the bus sways and believe me this is not a laughing matter and more so as most roads in Bangalore are in perennial repair mode. Getting a seat is another issue and you may even have to indulge in some strategies to grab one. You have to watch with eagle eyes for the slightest movement like somebody putting their books, music headsets or such paraphernalia in their bags or making a gesture to get out. Also listen keenly for the slight rustles and so on, I think you got the point. Then you jostle your way to that place either brashly or subtly, even if it means trampling on someone’s toes. If the goddess of luck smiles then you can have the seat. But most of the time Murphy will always smile on you. The moment you move from the place where you were standing for a good 45 minutes, the seats in that vicinity would get vacated only for you to see someone who had just hopped on the bus to occupy it and you will let out a silent scream, curse your luck and what not!
The seats aren’t that wide and if by any chance a person of liberal girth sits besides, you really have a nice journey trying to wriggle and squirm in your seat in your futile attempts not to get your shoulders chaffed. The biggest peril of all is the backpack missile and you really need to be ultra alert in negotiating these perilous and pernicious things. Techies as is their wont, will stuff their laptops in the backpack, sling it on the shoulders with an air of superciliousness and care two hoots about fellow passengers. They are IT, and if you cannot see the bright halos and the mysterious aura around them, well that’s’ your fault. At every twist and turn of the bus, accentuated by the air suspension in Volvo, you will be scrapped, chafed, frayed, brushed, bruised, pressed, squeezed and even compressed. Some of these bags are made up of material that really cuts thru the skin! It’s really an art dodging these obnoxious objects. You have to keep watching them closely as you have no idea when the guy will shift the weight to the other leg or turn any side or slump on you. Whatever may be the case one thing is for sure - You will get hit if you relax your vigil.
